Those who know Paris, know that France has its own set of social customs, some so small they may seem “invisible” to you at first.
Small things like always saying “bonjour” whenever you enter a restaurant café, and realizing the French come from a much more formal tradition than the United States: so don’t take the frowns or stern manners personally! While you’ll find the French slower to “warm up” than Americans, you’ll soon learn French bonds of friendship run very deep.
When it comes to gay socializing in the French capital, you may well find the rules changed in this regard, as well. While in the United States someone interested in someone else may feel perfectly at easy using the “direct approach,” be aware that French customs still apply!
Some of these customs may seem odd to you at first, but a little investment in learning them will go a long way. For example, in the United States it is extremely common to smile at a stranger, to show you mean no harm. In France, however, the rule is flipped. Smiling too early in a conversation can be seen, culturally, as a sign of insincerity, superficiality or falseness. (After all, you don’t really know the other person yet!)
Your best bet is: a) to display impeccable manners in saying “bonjour”; b) keep a dignified expression (save the smiles for when something humorous is discussed or happens; it will happen soon enough!); and c) make an honest effort to speak French. These are the “golden rules” insofar as how the French see visitors, so stick to them and you stand the best chances of warming the person you’re speaking with to you.
That being said, relax and be yourself! Parisians tend to socialize in groups, so feel free to bring along friends, as well.
However, if you find the prospect of flirting with the French a little daunting (and please remember it’s the same for everyone in France: please don’t feel that any chilliness is somehow directed at you, personally!), remember there are many wonderful international gay clubs in Paris, where you’ll find visitors from all over the world congregating to have cheerful fun.
Two gay clubs in Paris with friendly, unpretentious reputations include
Le Tango (la boite a frissons) at 13 rue au Maire. Metro: Arts et Metiers, and Le Club 18, at 18 rue du Beaujolais. 75001 Paris, Metro: Palais-Royal.
Of course, there are many wonderful, friendly clubs all over Paris, particularly in the vicinity of the Marais.
Yet another of these clubs, with a great reputation for having a fun-loving, international clientele is
Open Café at 17 rue des Archives (Metro Hôtel de Ville or Rambuteau).
To stay near the fun, we recommend taking a look at the great selection of available
Paris apartments at http://www.MyKeysToParis.com.
And stay tuned, as next time we’ll be exploring the many NON-clubbing ways to get out and enjoy Paris, the City of Lights!
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